The Art of Delegation

One of the most important life skills anyone can learn – whether they are a high powered business executive, a manual worker or a stay-at-home mother – is the art of delegation.

So many of us, even since the industrial revolution which shifted society generally more in the direction of specialisation of labour and individuals spending their working lives on specific types of task , are still unable or unwilling to “let things go” allowing someone else to relieve us of some of our demands and responsibilities. Sadly we women are particularly guilty here. Maybe it’s because we’re naturally better at multi-tasking and are quite capable of cooking the dinner, answering the phone, thinking about the presentation we need to give the next day and finding the PE kit in the washbasket simultaneously!

But whatever the reason our reluctance to seize opportunities to delegate can cost us dear.

So many of us now, particularly in households where both husband and wife are working and there are children and other domestic caring responsibilities to consider, as well as other demands such as from our childrens’ schools and other activities, really feel squeezed between a “rock and a hard place”. We set ourselves high standards to pay the bills, keep lovely homes, to look good, keep fit, keep the garden stunning and the house clean with no help, look after pets and ageing parents, maintain active social lives and support our children in their endeavours both academic and extra-curricular.

Many of these “jobs” are simply part of living our lives and we wouldn’t wish to delegate them. A-list actress Renee Zelwegger once famously said she enjoys picking up her own dry cleaning as to delegate it would be like letting someone else live her life! But most of us at some time find the balance is a little out of kilter and at such times it really helps to focus on what we could delegate to others. Even if it’s just temporarily, or on a trial basis at times when we could use a little self-kindness.

So why do we not delegate? I bet you know people who are forever complaining about how busy their lives are and they simply can’t squeeze everything in, but they still insist on doing everything they’ve been doing in the same way and thinking that somehow this pressure will go away all by itself.

I think 3 of the most common reasons why we resist delegating are Guilt, Pride and Standards... hmmm, GPS – a tool for pointing us the right way... but ONLY if we use it intelligently – food for thought there!

Guilt – women again are most susceptible here. We look at other people and perceive that they are coping – they are doing this so clearly we can too. Or it’s a job no-one else would want to do so why ask anyone. But who are we to judge? Doctors surgeries are full of people on the edge of depression saying “but I look at everyone else and THEY all seem to be coping.” And the doctors again and again have to point out that what you see is not necessarily what is going on behind closed doors.

We all enjoy doing different things and we all have different motivations for choosing to spend our time as we do. PLUS although your neighbour might keep their garden stunning without employing any outside help despite having two toddlers maybe they have more family support than you. Or maybe they LOVE gardening and would love to do yours in exchange for you doing their ironing or perhaps looking after their children one afternoon a week. Just one example of course.

Pride – you hear others saying “I always cook a full roast every Sunday” or “I’ve never had any help around the house” with pride and you feel that in some sense you would be failing if you were weak enough to make a different choice in your life. Especially if that message has also come from your parents or your in-laws! Or you couldn’t bear to ask anyone to clean your house as you’d have to tidy it first or they might think less of you if they saw it in its usual “lived in” state... imagine!

Standards – you know that no-one else could do it quite like you. Whether it’s preparing that report for the boss, researching those possible new suppliers for your business or doing the ironing / tidying the kids’ bedrooms – no-one would do it quite the way you would. And you know what... you might be right... BUT WHAT IS IT COSTING YOU TO DO EVERYTHING YOURSELF?

Peace of mind, time when you could be playing with your children, or taking some fresh air to enhance your physical and mental health, the ability to really enjoy and experience life rather than merely surviving it? The costs of NOT delegating can be huge.

But what if we “get over these” reasons not to delegate? What if we search within ourselves and think of all the resources we have around us we could draw on if we choose... people, skills, equipment, space... that might be of value in lightening the load?

We can be more productive, enjoy our lives more and be more fulfilled as we are more able to make best use of our unique skills and talents – the things we are truly gifted with and enjoy doing.

So if you had the power within you what would you delegate? At work and at home? If you really want to see how it can improve your life there will be a way to make it happen.

Summer holidays are upon us now and this is a great time for rethinking the way we do things and what might be a better way in future. What will YOU delegate?

Have a great summer Best wishes,

Amanda

I still have a couple of private client spaces for June and beyond. If you wish to arrange a free consultation to see how I could help you with delegation or any other area of your professional or personal life please e-mail me on Amanda@WiseLifeCoaching.com.

Or check out my website www.WiseLifeCoaching.com for more information.